Rowan Atkinson - Elementary Dating

99

Good evening, and welcome to the Boston University Huntington Theatre.

For this the second part of the course in "Elementary Courting for Man"

May I say, how festal I am with tonight turn-out, same 800 people.

It is very gratifying.

Tonight we will look at the first date.

Obviously, taking out a girl for the first time is a very complex issue.

The first crucial step is having arranged to pick up your date,

not to look like a complete idiot when she opens the door.

Best to look as your attention has been momentarily distracted

you do notice her, it is vital to say how pretty she is looking straightaway.

But, don't overdo it.

If at this point you are introduced to her parents, attitude is all important.

You can be too casual.

But you can be too keen.

When you say goodbye to the parents, again don't overdo it.

Lead her to your car.

And remember to open door.

Once in the car, there are various ways of driving.

If you drive like this

You might lose her respect.

If you drive like this

You should taken a taxi.

Before long you will arrive at the restaurant, get out of the car

and escort her to your table.

Then tuck her in to her seatyourself

And attract the waiter's attention.

Selecting from the wine list is important. Complete ignorance is not good.

When the bottle arrives, there is much to be made of the tasting of the wine.

But, don't be too professional.

With eating, again, moderation is the order of the day.

Don't eat too fast

But don't eat too slowly.

Next is receiving the bill. This is very important moment.

You must be sure not to lose your cool. This is right

This, is wrong

The girl may of course, offer to pay herself. In which case, you should, refuse.

For a while.

Next stop is a fashionable dicotheque.

Once inside you might look slightly strange if you try to talk over the music.

So stand casually and look sexy.

This is good.

This is better.

This, is starting to be misguided

After stance, dance technique is most important.

Most people don't know how to dance and so they do too much

Other people do too little.

Some people dance as if they had something in there bottom.

And others people dance as if they had something coming out there bottom.

When all said done is best probable not to dance of the whole.

Well mimed sports injury is always useful

and a good excuse for leaving the discotheque.

aaaaa You don't found up, 20 minutes later should be back at your place.

aaaaa It is important to relax and make your guest feels at home

nervous is you do and is no need to make any extra special effort.

Then puting on the music

One can't help you with the choice of CD.

In no matter what in these circumstances,

Donnie and Marie Osmonds greatest hits would be a mistake.

Above all, avoid the temptation to brag about your stereo.

Now comes the moments you'll be wait for, the seduction.

This, is the subject of next week lecture.

Although as a rough guide, this is right.

And this, I think you'll agree, disastrous.